Banjitar

Tuesday night I was convinced that I should check out a chick singer at the somewhat local Irish Pub (there’s many… are any of them REALLY Irish?). Pub schmub… it’s just a bar. I hate bars! But I agreed because… well… chick singers! So A took me to O’Brien’s to listen to Janet Robin (whom I’d never heard of prior but who has a hardcore rockin’ style like a proper student of Melissa Etheridge).

I adored the four singers (the “Songwriter’s on Tap”) and it was a bonus that it was a “no cover” Tuesday evening (which means – free entry & low attendance… so Erin is properly comfortable and not annoyed). I did feel it necessary to offer their establishment SOME money so I purchased a Midori Sour… my new “old standby” for when any given joint is tapped out of pear cider. (Really… there’s like 2 places that I know of that actually have my hard cider drinks on tap. I don’t expect it… BUT IT WOULD BE NICE, BAR GODS!) So that cost me 8 bucks (including tip).

My two favorites of the evening was a shy, long-haired Italian dude named Clarence (something, goddamnit! Can’t figure it out!!) who sounded like a soulful black man when he sang his tunes and Libbie Schrader (http://www.myspace.com/libbieschrader) who pumped her keyboard with a playing/writing/singing style a la Sarah Mc/Tori/Michelle Branch.

And my other new favorite is the Banjitar!

Two Big Kudos for the frikkin’ Banjitar!




What, pray tell, is a Banjitar? Well, my good pupil, a Banjitar is a cross-between a banjo and a guitar!! Janet Robin played this heavenly instrument for mine own ears!

Since I’m a pseudo-country girl with a newer sort of love for the bluegrass sound – it was awesome to hear a twangy-rocky mix all bundled into one instrument. I think I will now seek out Banjitar music. Or better yet – teach myself the Banjitar!!

I’ll have to schedule that right after my 5-10 year stint in Ireland acting as an apprentice Uilleann Pipe maker (as I hear that’s the only proper way to get one/learn to play one).

(Uilleann Pipe = the Irish bagpipe, played with a hand-pumped bellows instead of blowing into a bag…. Sounds like your soul ripping apart from sorrow… I heart the Uilleann Pipe most of all, Toto!)

Trials and Tribulations

T laid out some step by step hair styling directions for me to achieve "something flippy" and I attempted to follow them "to a T"! (ha!) (sorry)

"T's Directions:
1) a deep conditioner, preferably pantene deep condiitoner treatment
2) paul mitchelle detangler to avoid knots
3) a little frizz ease mousse
4) blow-dry with brush
5) frizz ease serum
6) straightner

And you will achieve the look in the picture, though w/o the blondness!"

And, just like I cook, I had had to make some substitutions along the way.

1) I stole some "deep conditioners" from my mother's shower (all I had was straightening and curling shampoos and conditioners). I used some Aveda something or other (with color in it to add some auburn???) and some other Nutrio (er something) deep conditioning shampoo.

2) I borrowed some of mom's Bedhead curling spray (I realize this is not a detangler but somehow since it was a spray I felt it somehow counted)

3) I blowdried with a diffuser.



4)To calm the crazy I brushed and re-blowdried (from underneath like the barber-lady told me) sans diffuser. By now I'd achieved someTHING flippy.



5) I had some Paul Mitchell straightening serum (which also purported to calm frizz) - added that and re-brushed. By now I'd styled a hair helmet a la Sally Field in STEEL MAGNOLIAS.



6) And finally - the straightener. (I assumed that T meant the plugin heated kind.)

And now I have some sort of shaggy rock star flippy chic (for the hour... until the flips refurl (?) back into their normal water-buffalo look).

I got a call for an interview on Thursday so I had to put my hunt for haircut into overdrive and decided upon something flippy.




(And wondered... will my hair ever behave that way? Really?)

So working with the suggestion of two separate people who didn't know each other I went to Rudy's Hair Salon in Silverlake. I felt cool by association when I went in there. It was a big vaulty-warehouse type of space (supposedly a converted garage) with trendy magazines and punk rock stylists. My hair was done by a chick that reminded me of a cross between Chrissy Hynde and Gina Gershon in Prey For Rock and Roll (except with funky spiky red & black hair). She was great! She walked me through each cut she did, explained why she was doing it, didn't intimidate me in the slightest... etc. etc. And I left feelin' rockin!

But then my hair does what it does and now I feel like I look like a nun fresh without her habit. Eek. (It'll grow back! It'll grow back! It'll grow back!)

Before and After:



(Note the non-smiling "after" picture.)

However... I do look more like Ally Sheedy in The Breakfast Club now.

I'm extra creepy cuz I just fell down.

Sometimes I'm quite easily entertained by something not incredibly funny... but if it's funny to me I can laugh repeatedly for hours. Quotes out of context are particularly entertaining. My quote out of context for the weekend is "I'm extra creepy because I just fell down."

But I decided to give you context.

So after watching The Celluloid Closet my new friend "A" decided to rent THE CHILDREN'S HOUR. (Here's a brief summary with SPOILER) Audrey Hepburn and Shirley Maclaine run a school for girls (and have been best friends since college). One of their students is an evil she-brat who is trying to get out of going back to school so she tells her influential grandma that Audrey and Shirley are evil unnatural lesbians. Grandma then tells all the parents - girls get taken out of the school - Audrey & Shirley lose their libel case and have their reputations permanently tarnished. Then Shirley comes to grips with "Oh shit! I'm an unnatural lesbian after all! I want to have hot unnatural relations with Audrey-friend!" - and then outs herself to Audrey. THEN influential grandma finds out that the she-brat was lying and swears to reinstate the reputation of our two protagonists. But TOO LATE... Shirley's said too much to Audrey! So she makes the appropriate decision for evil unnatural lesbians and hangs herself from the nearest rafter. The End.

Well at some point during the viewing "A" got a little shifty and fidgety because she's a bad film student and doesn't like black and white flicks and since I'd already seen the last half of the movie we started doing a bad lesbian-themed MST3K heckling of events. So ... when Grandma finds out that she-brat granddaughter was lying about the teachers she gives the granddaughter a stare down. When the granddaughter won't come down the stairs to take her punishment like a man, grandma starts walking towards her... and she trips and falls. There's a moment of "Oh Crap! Look at what that evil kid made her do. She made grandma not look in front of her when she was stare-walking!!" before Grandma gets up... and is (yes, you guessed it) "extra creepy because she just fell down!" Haaaaaaaaaaa



But at least Shirley Maclaine was a cute unnatural deviant. (And I'm saying things like that more now because I've started to have some non-straight acquaintances and they expect these things that were previously just in my head to be said aloud. And you'd think it would be somehow freeing but it's just weird!)

Catgirl

The problem with managing my time like a cat (napping during the day, sleeping in and generally being nocturnal) is that I very often encounter the damn updates of websites that take place at "godawful" hours and I can't do the shit I wanna do!

Harry Recycled Witch

I love it! I love it so much it feels familiar. I may have posted this a long ass while ago... or this may be the first time I've seen it.

Harry Potter compared to The Worst Witch

Thumbsucker

Last night I saw a free screening of Thumbsucker (which is one of those movies that I'll mildly enjoy but I might find GENIUS after I read the novel its based on). It was cute... I thought the plot was mildly vague. The presenter compared it to Napoleon Dynamite (hate that movie) or Garden State (mildly enjoyed). Of the two it was definitely more like Garden State with a Real Women Have Curves ending. (What is about 'moving to the big city' that makes everybody free and happy??)

However this isn't a review! This movie stirred up some memories and so I decided to list a few of them.

But first:

Hello, my name is Erin, and I'm a recovered thumbsucker. I was a thumbsucker until I was 16. (Yes, it's true!)

That's one of my many kept "secrets" (of which I have no real kept secrets because at least one person knows every one of my secrets since I can't keep secrets).

Unlike the Thumbsucker character, I ONLY sucked my thumb at bed time and ONLY with my special knit "blankie" with the Tweety Bird on it.

And now... memories:

- The disgusting tasting thumb method of cutting the habit - I *think* I remember that method being used on me. At least I remember that there were occasions when my thumb didn't taste so good and that there might have been a specific evil reason for it.

- When my parents renewed their vows and had a proper wedding ceremony (I was about 7) they hired a cleaning service to come in and scour the house (where the reception was being held). This was when Blankie 1 disappeared!!!! Being me and knowing that my parents didn't want me to suck my thumb anymore - I accused them of paying the maids to discard my blankie! (More likely they probably thought the tattered thing was a rag and took it with them.) I was DEVASTATED!! I couldn't sleep for days!! I needed some kind of replacement but HOW COULD MY BLANKIE BE REPLACED?? The answer - #2 Blankie. This was actually it's name. Had it a birth certificate it would read "Number Two Blankie Lillis." #2 Blankie was #1 Blankie's first cousin. There was a bigger, fuzzier 3rd cousin but he didn't slip so well between my fingers and thumb. You see I needed to Smell the blankie while I sucked. It was the soft blankie and the dryer sheet smell that calmed me to sleep. (Please don't ask.. I don't know the psychological reasoning behind it but yes, I'm sure it had to do with being weened from the breastfeeding too soon or something.)

- Once I was finally used to it, #2 Blankie was THE one and only acceptable blankie. My mother would often steal the blankie (after laundering it) and hide it in her room. I remember going on several blankie hunts but always finding the blankie in the end. (My nights were really sleepless when I didn't have it.)

- I recall that when I was a bit older my mother and I sat down and had a discussion (let's say I was 10) about giving up the blankie. (I'm not sure if it was really the blankie they wanted rid of or the thumbsucking as well.) Knowing how badly I reacted to the original blankie disappearing and the tantrums I'd throw when she'd steal it - this time she folded it neatly, put it in a paper bag, sealed it. labeled it with a Sharpie (Erin's Blankie) and put it in my closet. We decided that, yes, it was time to give up the blankie. I would try to sleep without it... but if there were an emergency I'd know where it was. I think I made it one night without #2 Blankie before I ripped the bag open.

- I remember being self-conscious of my sucking thumb because the nail looked a little different. It was always shorter than the rest of my nails and a little softer (as you can well imagine).

- At some point it became a "fuck you" to society. I had several thumbsucker friends... and slowly they were giving it up... until by highschool I was the only one that I knew left. When going to the dentist they would tell me about my overbite and ask why ... I would always lie and say "I used to suck my thumb."

- Thumbsucking was one of the slew of reasons that I never really cared for sleepovers... I was too embarassed to bring my blankie but couldn't sleep without it.

- What finally had me give up the habit was distraction (or so we'll call her for the blog entry). It became an off and on thing and the moment I realized that I could actually fall asleep without the blankie I would sleep with it near me... or do a "sleepover" without it... or keep it under my pillow. And the thing is that I couldn't suck my thumb without the blankie... so the thumbsucking just fell by the wayside. It also occurred to me that I just couldn't do it anymore by the time I got to college so it was time to cut the habit on my own. (You see when it was MY decision - it worked.)

- And as a "just in case"... I believe I did take a patch of #2 Blankie with me to college.

And though I did eventually get some orthodontic work (but not braces) - I never bothered to fix my thumbsucker's overbite.

What Erin does for Fun!

How I kill some of my spare time:





(And then of course taking pictures of the slaughtered lemon, adding photoshop text and uploading useless pictures to blogs.)

Whoah

This blog was the header on Blogger today:

http://twinkieexperiment.blogspot.com/

Apparently two twins are trading places and blogging about the experience.

Grapple with Grape-L

Dad's on an organic/fruit/vegetable kick at the moment. Which is actually quite difficult for him because he's an "I only like vegetables from cans!" type of guy. The sad aspect of this is that he is doing it as a last minute attempt at heart health because he has a faulty valve and will need surgery soon. He's obviously a little scared because he keeps saying things like "I think I'll buy a new table saw ... but not until after surgery." (Which makes me think he's either afraid of the cost of the surgery... or worse, not surviving the surgery.) (Which I'm not thinking about! I'm not thinking about! I'm not thinking about!)

But on the organic/fruit/vegetable kick he brought home a box of "Grāpple™ brand apples" (pronounced Grape-L) which advertised that they "looked like an apple but tasted like a grape." Initially I thought that these were some cool new hybrid fruit like the Pluots we've been seeing (and eating) everywhere lately (Pluot = Half Plum/Half Apricot). I've even been informed that the next big thing is going to be Strawmatos (Half Strawberry/Half Tomato) imported from out of the country. But as I bit into a Grāpple I soon realized THIS IS NO HYBRID! This is an apple injected with artificial grape flavoring!! (And then I read the same on the plastic container they came in.) They didn't taste like grapes!! They tasted like purple candy!! Yeah they were nasty! (Unless you like purple candy.)

Grāpple

Pulp Culture

I'm in love with Jennifer Rapp.

Her art makes me laugh aloud... and a little maniacally at that.



(You can find the Teetersaw Tales cards here: http://www.pulpcouture.com and view her site at http://www.teetersaw.com)

Charity

My charity of choice in Katrina-relations:

Where are they now?

I've been a fan since 1992 but the November 1990 issue of "16" just brought to my attention something I wasn't aware of!

"The TV-Tattler - Meet the GLORY DAYS Boys!"

Betcha those hot new dudes caught you eye this summer - the stars of Fox-TV's limited series about four friends was a grabber. Who grabbed YOU the most?

NICHOLAS KALLSEN played Peter "T-Bone" Trigg, the one who was good-natured but usually broke! In real life, Nick's a total newcomer: He's never been on TV before! He studied theater at Boston University and had bit parts in the movies Say Anything and The Gambler.
BRAD PITT was Walter Lovejoy, the high school jock who, cut from his college team, quit to become a reporter. Brad's an LA babe you've seen before - on Growing Pains and in Dallas.
SPIKE ALEXANDER was the insecure rookie cop Dave Rutecki - in real life, Spike (whose real name is Stephen) is a TV tyro, whose one previous credit was a bit part on The Cosby Show. He's not new to performing, though: Spike's an accomplished lead dancer with the American Ballet Company.
EVAN MIRAND played Dominic Fopiano, the freshman struggling to overcome his working-class background. A native New Yorker, Evan's been in many stage productions and a few TV movies as well!



Mr. Kallsen has been in one thing since GD - "The Seventh Coin."
Mr. Alexander has been in a few more things, including the TV show "N.Y.P.D. Mounted."
Mr. Mirand was also in "N.Y.P.D. Mounted" and in a movie called "Fight Club."
Mr. Pitt... well he's been busy.

Some news about some stuff

Here's a smattering of how some landmarks are faring in NOLA:


AP News - Landmarks affected by Katrina

Katrina Points

I wanted to write a little something about Katrina but I didn't know how to put it into one cohesive post so here's just some thoughts and snippets.

- I've been watching a cycle of The Weather Channel, CNN Headline News and CNN (my Hurricane Katrina headquarters!) since probably Sunday night. I've been watching video feeds on the Internet. From predictions, to hurricane path watches, to past comparisons... and then to flood maps, and during-storm-wind shots and etc. I feel very involved in the whole process yet still I know nothing.

- Why have I been involved in the process? Well for one - Miriam's sister Nora lives there (or "lived" there... now she's on her way back to L.A.). Two - I finally visited New Orleans last year and now feel a sort of attachment to it. Three - Anne Rice vampires. Four - Ghosts. And most importantly, Five - if a hurricane of "biblical proportions" was going to submerge a city - I fucking wanted to witness that shit live!

- I could rant about the government and the shit they ain't doing fast enough but the person that peeved me the most was the head of FEMA who said (in response to the question "why weren't there National Guardsmen immediately ready to move in?") "We had brainstorming meetings with a lot of people and the simple explanation is that none of us foresaw this worst case scenario." Bull-fucking-crap!! I'm a non-logical-minded girl who has been to the city once as a friggin' tourist and every friggin' tour guide and taxi driver said "and these are our levees which, if they don't withstand a hurricane, will flood our below-sea-level city." So you're telling me, FEMA dude, that I knew that and your highly prepared and intellectual group of planners didn't see that coming??? Again I mention that I was WATCHING the hurricane LIVE to see if it would submerge the city.

- And yet watching everything live still ended up with me missing everything. I tried to stay up the whole night to watch Katrina hit but I ended up going to bed and waking up the next morning to watch some video tape of storm and winds. The best was when the CNN anchor said "Let's just listen to the wind on this tape for a moment" and then they cut to storm footage and the reporter (on the scene) could be heard saying "Fuck Me!!"

- And still I've been watching a cycle of news coverage to try and find out about the things concerning me like "What happened to the animals at the Audubon Zoo?" "What's going to happen to the students that were about to start school and the universities?" "What happened to the universities?" "Are there gators floating by everywhere?" "Does Nora have a job??" "Is the French Quarter covered in powdered sugar... making it a syrupy sort of mess?" And etc... but every focus has been "where are the helicopters?? where's the food??" (Which is obviously also important.)

- I have an acquaintance through MySpace who's from New Orleans. We met in a "paranormal" group there because she'd actually seen my picture of Julie the Octoroon ghost from Royal Street on the internet. (http://www.neworleansghosts.com/Ghosts.htm Picture number 13!) She wasn't in town at the time Katrina hit because she'd flown out to be a bridesmaid in a wedding. Now all she's left with (as her house is gone) is the bridesmaid dress, two changes of outfit, flip flops and $200 in the bank. I told her I'd rather give her the $20 donation I could afford to make sure that she could buy a couple of tacos and a pair of Payless shoes. She told me she'd be too humiliated to take any handouts... but desperate times call for desperate measures. I'm waiting a few days more to see if she'll change her mind. (Though now she wants me to call her to talk about it all and I'm like "ewwww! Phones!" but... desperate times call for desperate measures.)

- When my parents and I were in New Orleans last year we stayed in a hellish B & B that shouldn't have been open to the public yet as their rooms were OBVIOUSLY not ready to be occupied by humans. My Dad giggled a little evil the other day and said, "I wonder what happened to that place!" I checked their site. They've said they didn't have a lot of damage and the music in the courtyard will resume shortly. Oh and if you happen to be without a home... they'll soon be offering long-term stay packages. (?????!?!?!??!?!) (There's no fairness in this world.) (http://www.creolegardens.com/) But to give them the benefit of the doubt... I don't think the owners (or at least the one that wrote that up on the site) have actually been back to survey the damage yet.

- If you want to know my thoughts on the looting you can read T's "Tea & Toast" blog because all I'd pretty much write is "Yeah! What she said!!" But with the addition, "Now that you've floated that flat screen back to your submerged apartment... where did you plan on plugging that in Genius?"

- The convention center. Who the frick FORGOT to tell FEMA about the convention center?? That's one hell of a missed memo.

Positive Energy

(I don't even have to try.)

Big Bopper - June 1990

"Milli Vanilli is Full of Meaning"

Names never lie, and the secret to this duo's success comes partly from their catchy name!

A group's name often reveals a lot about the musical style and personality of its members. Milli Vanilli is no exception.

Derived from the Turkish language, milli vanilli means positive energy when translated. And when you see Rob Pilatus and Fabrice Morvan sing and dance to their hit songs, including "All or Nothing" or "Blame it on the Rain," you know positive energy is what this European duo is all about.

...

When Michael Jackson's music became popular in Germany, this green-eyed talent started to see things a little differently. "I could make it. Michael gave me confidence and hope that I could make it as a pop star, even if I was black," confesses Rob as he tosses back his long black braids of hair.

...

But Fab promises his fans that no matter how big they get, they will never sit back and take their succes for granted.

Sage Words

As you may have noticed in the longish post previous (written as my mother) - I recently uncovered a pile of dirty magazines while working to tidy up my parents' garage. ("Dirty" as in there is dirt and dust and mouse chew holes in/on them.) The stuff I'm going through is large trash bags full of my old toys and belongings that were dragged out to my garage by two people hired, by my mother, to bag it all up and toss it out of my room when I was a preteen. I was supposed to go through it then... but you know... procrastination. Now most of it is just going directly into the trash since a lot of it has been pooped on.

But these magazines are gems!! They hold enormous value to society and history and yet they're too worn and dirty for eBay. So I've decided to go through them and pull out some of their sage words and humorous (in retrospect) quotes, document them in this blog and then toss the zine!

The first contender is the June 1990 issue of "The Big Bopper."

Immediately I giggle because there is a front page headline which reads "WHY DOESN'T CHAD ALLEN HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?" (This is funny because Chad Allen is now "out.") I flipped open to find out "why" and found that I had previously cut out that page. (This is going to be one of the problems with this interesting project because half of these magazines have been "clipped" to fill my Fred Savage shrine binders and my New Kids on the Block files.)

But I DID manage to find this goodness in an article about Tom Cruise:

"Fifteen-year-old Chad Allen is also a fan of the July 3, 1962 birthday celebrator. 'I really look up to Tom,' reveals Chad as he points to the Risky Business and Top Gun posters hanging on his bedroom walls. 'Tom is young and he's done so many great movies, I'd like to be in a movie with him someday.' "